First fight of the morning... what is it with little boys that makes them fight ... for no reason. Oh, I am sure they think they have a reason but just because your brother is sitting beside you does not strike me as enough motivation to punch him in the stomach... maybe it's just me.

which leads me to the second part of yesterday's question....

When dealing with your male characters and learning of their emotional motivation, how to you get them to cooperate? How do you know when to keep at him, keep pushing him and try to make him work or when to pull his argumentative unhelpfull ass out and plunk in a new character?

I am loathe to give up on them - the male characters - but every once in a while I think you do have to cut your losses and move on to the next guy.

I have tried to get him into the grove by maybe throwing in a dead body, explosion or ass whooping but that doesn't always give him the arena to release his inhibitions and let the heroine fall in love and vice versa. And obviously men (i.e. grown little boys) have motivators that are borne of nothing more than adrenaline and agression. Don't get me wrong - Die Hard is one of my favorite movies so I can appreciate blood and pain with the best of them but when you have given your hero all that and he still doesn't come around do you shove him out the door and pull open the casting couch for number two?

I was going to write on GMC - Goal, Motivation, and Conflict - but honestly I could not get started ... no obvious pun intended here - I truly did pull open a research book to get started ... but it is already hot in my office and I cannot focus - I am going to buy a fan today I think. I bought a celing fan years ago but apparently when they built the house they didn't put in a beam over the top so it would take some major construstion to have it done... anyhoo...

I have been contemplating the motivations of the characters - most specifically the male characters (as I think I can relate some to the female ones).

I wonder how far do you delve into the psyche of your characters. To really get at the heart of their emotional motivation. Physical motivation is a given - someone's shooting at you, you shoot back or run the other way. Someone's trying to run you down, you throw a brick through their windshield or blow out their tires.

But what about the emotions... What motivates a man's abitlity to love or not...

For instance, what makes a man shy away from a relationship? What makes a man turn on a dime, turn off his emotions, when a woman tells him she cares about him or, God forbid, loves him. That's the hardest questions to answer for me. But do you really need to know the answers to write a strong believable hero?

tell me what you think.....

Your Summer Ride is a Beetle Convertible

Fun, funky, and a little bit euro. You love your summers to be full of style and sun!

slow blogging weekend... not least of which why is the bruised, swollen w/a knot knee and couple of broken bones in the opposite foot - yeah, I am a major klutz - tripped over the kids computer stool and whamo-bamo - I'm limping the days away - no worries I am fine just a little embarrassed as I scared the bejeepers outta Spare

and sadly... my first thought was: now I can accurately describe the dizziness and nausea that comes w/ major pain and injury... ever the writer...

funnies from my Yankee Aunt.....

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.

Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "Implants?" She hit me.

How come we choose from just two people to run forpresident and over fifty for Miss America?

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Wow..that was fun!"

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."

Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over? AMEN, AMEN !!

Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?

Wouldn't you know it...Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FATcells live forever.

Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside?

Bumper sticker of the year: "If you can read this, thank a teacher -and, since it's in English, thank a soldier"

And remember: life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

that's all that is left of my quiet - school is out as of early tomorrow afternoon.

I will say, I have sent off a couple of books to editors for consideration... so I havent been unproductive lately... And after watching King of the Hill I thought of a funny idea for a book... yeah, I am a weird one - like this is news to anyone!

Watched American Idol last night - Hope Taylor Hicks wins - though I will miss it tonight, but it will be saved in my DVR!

For all my complaining of all the maleness in my household, I do love sports -

The Mavericks won game seven in overtime against the Spurs - WOOHOO!!!
I was watching the season finale of Medium last night but had to keep switching back to the game. All the kids were asleep about 10:15 and I saw the end of the game. And in the darkened family room all by my lonesome, I did the my-team-just-whooped-your-ass and moves on to the next round dance - yes indeedy!

Now to whoop up on Nash and the Suns! WOOHOO!!!

I got dad shipped off to Detroit today and Spare is on his way to camp - and is so excited he couldn't see straight! I will have half the testosterone out of the house for a whole week!

Being w/o the computer so much the last two weeks, I am way behind in writing and yes, I had been working. I have 3 or 4 books I needed to get out and one WIP I was working on so with the house half empty this week, I will take advantage of the near quiet - yeah, right!

WOOHOO!

Have a geat week all!

it's a slow weekend - had to turn the computer back into Best Buy AGAIN yesterday ... the new memory they installed failed and they had to replace what they had replaced - why they didn't check that in the first place BEFORE they gave the stupid computer back to me is beyond me - but I have it back AGAIN - wonder how many days I can use it this time before I have to go back to the store and get them to repair their repairs?!?!?

sheesh !

happy Sunday - we'll just be hanging out as Spare goes of to 4th grade camp tomorrow for the week (the last week of school) and dad will be going to either Detroit or Cleveland for over a week - where all depends who wins the basketball game as he is going as an employee of ESPN - oh pool boy............

If and when you can’t move forward in your book, I have a challenge (or three) that might help you out.

Take a story you maybe working on that you haven’t created the synopsis for it. Read through it and pull out one or two key pieces of the story per chapter. Once you have a compiled a short list, elaborate on every sentence into you have a paragraph or two and without realizing you have written a couple of pages and your mental juices are tapped and flowing.

Or if you don’t have enough material to pull from (maybe you’re stuck in chapter two) you can “interview” you characters. I have not actually done this before but I know several authors that swear by it. The questions may not be info that you necessarily want in the story but it will help you get a better hold on your people and maybe keep them from smacking your muse around and playing monkey in the middle with your plot – just a thought.

Last, as I have mentioned before have a “stash of crap” bowl. (I think I called it something else but cannot for the life of me remember what it was and I am far too lazy to plug in the phone cord, get online and go through my archives…sorry) The bowl consists of “crap” you can metaphorically – unless of course you have some weird kinky fetish – throw at your H/H. The clown scene that I have in “My Works” blog, I got from said bowl. Make a list of the scariest, worst, most threatening-to-the-relationship things that can befall our H/H and then wham, bam, get me the hell outta here ma’am let ‘er rip!

Just some ideas (and coming up w/ said ideas are my way of writing procrastination – I WAS working on a synopsis – for my defense, I did have to stop and get dessert for Mini-me then ten minutes later change out the video that he was watching – if it begs me twenty minutes peace between – have Mickey will baby-sit… though it does break my concentration and cause me to come up w/ stellar blog ideas!) . . . . ***I guess I should also edit better first time around!

it's Friday... I feel funky... hence the avatar...

computer is almost back to normal but figured out they shorted me half the memory ... um, hello ... you owe me!!!

AND I'M GONNA COLLECT!!!!

nicked from Mary....

You Are a Boston Creme Donut

You have a tough exterior. No one wants to mess with you. But on the inside, you're a total pushover and completely soft. You're a traditionalist, and you don't change easily. You're likely to eat the same doughnut every morning, and pout if it's sold out.

I go my computer back - minus everything - they did save all the data so they said (I just have to figure out where the hell it all is - which is proving a challange to say the least...) - I now have to reinstall EVRYthing save Windows. It is going to take me a while......

The only thing I checked on the external hard drive that they copied it all to was my words files and they are all there so past that.... it's just an inconvenience!

Happy Wednesday...

oh and I got my hot cowboy pics back

the avatar is a mixed message - of having to dig for files - LOL - you know me.....

What do you think of when you hear: "You really need to pick up a craft book before you submit anything else."

Go ahead - think about that for a minute, I'll wait...

. . .

I told my mother this was a comment on a contest entry I got back. She asked me, macrame or witch.

"Beg pardon?"

"You said craft book, I thought you meant..."

"No, the contest judge was talking about a how-to-write book. Craft - the art of writing - book" I knew what that person - though sorely mistaken - meant. If you heard that, would you have known what I was talking about? Of course you would. You'd probably say did you use On Writing or somesuch. Not that the judge was in anyway right - as I have mentioned, save a few typos - I write perfect prose, intelligent introspection, corruptible copulation and delectable dialogue - she must have just been PMSing that day and couldn't stand the competition from me (hehehehe - see, can I spin a fictitious tale or what?!?!?)

Which lends the question, do writes have a speak all their own?

Yep!

Tell me the last time you heard POV in a conversation. Voice. GMC. Or heard someone mention head-hopping that didn't involve a heavily medicated dude in a pretty white jacket that buttons in the back.

He said

she said

he grimaced

she lamented

. . . . laughed, cried, yelled, whispered, questioned, replied, asked, answered, snorted, choked, groaned, moaned, etc, etc, etc . . . .

When I started writing, I used all the various tags for said and asked. Now I tend not to use them at all. You hope that each character's voice is distinct enough so the moment they speak, the reader knows that's your heroine. Or the crotchety neighbor. Wizened Grandmother. Studly hero. Their voice carries you past the he said, she said.

But when necessary you can use body business when you may have an intense scene that moves so quickly as to not have time for the reader to pick up on nuances. Or even put in introspection from the POV character as they say one thing that is not like them at all but think and mean another to lend to their voice.

As writers, I think we tend to be harder on writing works than readers. Readers, in my opinion, can ease into the story, get lost in the words far quicker than a writer. Writers will look for plot holes or purple prose. Not to say that readers can't detect craft issues, but they will pick up a book for entertainment. Me, I pick it up for contrast and comparison. For the craft of the writing. I do enjoy books still, but not like I did as years before when it was nothing more than a story to me.

Back to tags . . . I have read books where every line of dialogue is followed by a tag. I got to the point where I skimmed over tags and found the writer relied too heavily on them and I had to go back a re-read to see who the hell was talking. The writer (and I am not saying anyone specific as there are many that this may apply to and many it doesn't) uses tags as a way not to delve too deep into characterization as they don't have to make each character stand on their own, they tell you who is talking. (that can eke into show, don't tell - and that is a whole 'nother gripe of mine)

I will admit though, writers are the harshest critics and we tend to have that one or two things that we can pull our self up on the soap box and inhale deeply before we let it rip, so take what I say with a grain of salt.

Isn't there an adage of no news is good news? Does this apply to computer repair jobs? He did say it may be a couple of days - there were two guys in line in front of me when I got there. sheesh - there's an epidemic, I tell ya...

Happy Saturday all...
(ooooh - I just realized, I lost many pics - all my hot cowboys - at Best Buy - all my half nakes hunks - Best Buy - sheesh... pretty much all I have on here is CC and Bo... but wait - I do have pics for my characters in my books - so I can get more grounded and know who I am writing about...)

Jonathan Cake

Ryan Renolds

Ryan Hurst



and for Mark...

Amanda Detmer

Meredith Salanger

MJH

..."under warranty" means they smile at you when the ring up the data collection fee of $90 which is NOT in fact covered under said warranty as it is the dumbass' (that would be me) fault for not keeping a good enough back-up copy of every flipping possible file that I may use one day.

The hubby is mad that I had to pay anything... but HE didn't take it to Best Buy and try and work it out.

I am flustered and confused, but at least they have it to determine if they can determine the problem. If it is the hard drive, it will cost me less (they charge to put all that stuff BACK on the computer unless it is the hard drive since that is hardware and not an application that would be all my fault... or some silly shit) but I may not be able to retrieve all my data. If it is not the hard drive then, I may still lose everything as it may be corrupt and what cause the problem in the first place.

I told the young lad - as he was very young - I should just switch to a type writer and he all but laughed at me. Hello - ever heard of Danelle Steele? (though she can/does pay someone to transfer it after she's done). His reasoning, there is no delete and cut and paste. Doesn't he know that I write a pristine first draft - what does he take me for ... an amateur!?!?!

Oh well, I should know soon enough what the damage is. I did purchase an external hard drive that he assures me will work on this computer and mine if and when I get it back.

woe is me, the electronics killer.....

Okay - I will be calling Best Buy today to remedy my computer problems. I hate dealing with people like that. I never know how to come off. I always either end up being a total bitch or a complete pushoever. Is there a middle grounbd there? To get what you want without the female moniker, 'cause you know if it was a man dealing with them and said the EXACT same things, he would not be labeled.

I will say, I did buy the 3 year Best Buy Warrenty. The hubby bitched and moaned when I said I wanted it - we'll see if it was worth it.

I hate confrontation!

I am going old school... I wrote my first three books long hand - I think I am going to try and do that again - (one sold so it can't be too wrong!) - plus I don't have much choice. I can write on the kids computer but I want to purchase another thumb drive before I start on something and when I went to Wally-world today, that section was blocked off because they were working on the video games - I will go back later and get it. Until then...



AND Don't forget Mother's Day ~ Sunday - hug your momma.

This is what I want..
Cece and I do have tix for 6/09 so I'm good!

In light of my computer crash - I am NOT in a good mood - I found this in my old computer's e-mail files - Enjoy

These are QUITE offensive ~ If any of these offend you... move on to the next and laugh at someone else. And FWIW - I did NOT write them.... (I actually cut three out)


What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover ?
The position of the dirt bag

Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.

What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
Doughnuts

Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.

What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.

What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
45 lbs

What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
45 minutes

What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.

Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
Because they have cotton balls.

What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
"Are you sure it's mine?"

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you.

Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
Everyone has the same DNA.

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.

Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
He walks around saying "Yo."

Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
They named him "Sum Ting Wong"

What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.

What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
They're hiring.

What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with...
"a recipe".

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
A northern fairytale begins : "Once upon a time..."
A southern fairytale begins : "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

Drink Grape Juice, because ... OJ kills!

my brand spanking new computer crashed...

I updated my stuff two weeks ago... it should all be good - I am afraid to check right now


I feel numb!

update - 9 pm - FWIW - I didn't lose much - just two weeks worth - thank goodness I had been lazy and only gotten ten pages written! And the DH assures me we can and will get it all straightened out, the computer - dead as a doorknob - is still under warrenty!

I sent my editor a new book yesterday - so that is something - an I have BACK-UP (except the last couple of weeks) I have Back-up - 4 to be exact - but damn it is frustrating!

– if you are under 18 or are immature (you know who you are) please skip this and go some place else – NOW!

At our luncheon Saturday, Waldenbooks (I have whited out the name to protect the innocent book store that brought the books to our luncheon) had a mini-shop where we could pick up books from our speakers and other authors as well as craft book. Being that I am nothing if not thorough, (and I totally caved to peer pressure - yeah right!) I purchased, among other things, THE BIG BOOK OF FILTH.




OMG – I never knew there were so many terms for vaginas in my life. 955 according to the back of the book. 851 for penises; 239 for blow jobs – who knew! Apparently Cassell knew.

As funny as the book is it is hard to navigate as each er, ah, subject has sub-subjects and then sometimes even a sub-sub-subject – for instance: Sex for one – subject. Masturbating the man (pages) – sub-subject. Hitting the penis – sub-sub-subject. With terms like: bash the candle; biff off; bludgeon the beefsteak; choke Kojak; crack off; slam the hammer. And oh how it goes on….

I will say – it is actually a useful book. It has the dates of origin of terms, which is helpful when you are using the book as research and not just for giggles.

Did I mention the book also has illustrations???

Um – I gotta go now, see ya….. hehehehe

I have heard all the discussions on the evils of E-publishing. But don’t knock it. My book came out six weeks after I returned the contract – SIX WEEKS! How many print publishers can do that? Now, I will say, I think it was a fluke on my part – they had a spot that could/did need filled and mine slipped right in. My second book, which I sold at the same time, comes out in September and that is still less than the projected eighteen-month turnaround on print. PLUS – Deadly Mistakes WILL be in print two to three months after the e-release. (Not Her Passion though as it is a novella and too short for print on it own – if I can get that next one finished…!)

I have been reading e-books for over four years now. My mother, that is all she’ll read. She can manipulate the font size and as a baby-boomer who refuses to get glasses it is perfect for her.

Now depending on your writing affiliations, your opinion may be set. RWA is just now coming around to e-publishing. They have two publishers, Ellora’s Cave and Triskelion, they recognize-so far. But I have noticed – thanks to searching out my own book on the e-book sites – that there are so many books available in "e". Most, if not all, of Harlequin's books are now available in e-format - to me that says they are coming around!



Are they the wave of the future – well, maybe a half wave. I doubt a centuries old tradition of hold-in-hand-book will be gone. But it never hurts to have alternatives.

Having said that, nothing replaces the feel, smell and just overall being of a book, but as far as storage goes… wowzers, I have 30 e-books on my little Palm Pilot. I could never lug 30 books around – though I sure have tried before!

I cannot think of anything to post

hope this suffices.....

(and no, I don't know who this is - I took it from an e-mail I got from someone else, but he sure is pretty)

I had so much fun yesterday! All our guests were great! And the editor from Harlequin was fun - hopefully though, she will excuse my mouth from when we went to the Stockyards and the White Elephant bar... but I couldn't help myself - the band was great!

Maybe she won't remember how we shamelessy bought their CD's and spoke to them. =)

We are - however - exhausted! Sleep was not something we saw much of the last few days, buy I am not complaining. A superb luncheon, then shopping w/ Cece. A great dinner at Abuelo's followed - then the bar and hot music - who needed sleep! (not to mention the party Friday night!)

If you like country music - Stephen Pointer was great! Click on the pics to see the band! (And they're local Fort Worth boys!)

Filched from Cece...

Dennie will go to jail for ... Performing a strip tease on the street 'What sexual activity will you go to jail for?' at QuizUniverse.com

have a great weekend all!

I will be out of touch (much like today - I have been cleaning like a mad woman for the DirecTv Guy that is coming tomorrow to install my new DVR - it was either that or skip out Friday night and SJ didn't seem to please at my reasoning of not wanted to miss the second half of Ghost Whisperer finale) - Yellow Rose is having it's annual Conference/Awards Luncheon and we are busy!

We have several wonderful speakers coming and I have to finish getting the registration packets ready to go!

He's too cute not to throw out there with my reason to be blog-absent

(From my momma...)

1) Being sent to the drugstore to test vacuum tubes for the TV.

2) When Kool-Aid was the only drink for kids, other than milk and sodas.

3) When there were two types of sneakers for girls and boys (Keds & PF Flyers), and the only time you wore them at school, was for "gym."

4) When it took five minutes for the TV to warm up.

5) When nearly everyone's mom was at home when the kids got there.

6) When nobody owned a purebred dog.

7) When a quarter was a decent allowance, and another quarter a huge bonus.

8) When you'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny.

9)When girls neither dated nor kissed until late high school, if then.

10) When your mom wore nylons that came in two pieces.

11) When all of your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done, everyday.

12) When you got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking,..... for free, every time and you didn't pay for air. And you got trading stamps to boot!

13) When laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box.

14)When any parent could discipline any kid, or feed him, or use him to carry groceries, and nobody, not even the kid, thought a thing of it.

15) When it was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a real restaurant with your parents.

16) When they threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed...and did!

17) When being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited a misbehaving student at home.

Your Values Profile

Loyalty: You value loyalty a fair amount. You're loyal to your friends... to a point. But if they cross you, you will reconsider your loyalties. Staying true to others is important to you, but you also stay true to yourself. Honesty: You value honesty a fair amount. You're honest when you can be, but you aren't a stickler for it. If a little white lie will make a situation more comfortable, you'll go for it. In the end, you mostly care about "situational integrity." Generosity: You value generosity a fair amount. You are all about giving, as long as there's some give and take. Supportive and kind, you don't mind helping out a friend in need. But you know when you've given too much. You have no problem saying "no"! Humility: You value humility highly. You have the self-confidence to be happy with who you are. And you don't need to seek praise to make yourself feel better. You're very modest, and you're keep the drama factor low. Tolerance: You value tolerance a fair amount. You are open to new cultures, beliefs, and ideas. You have very few prejudices that you're aware of. And while you are tolerant, you do stand true to what you believe.

You Should Weigh #$% (please you think I'm gonna show that?!?!)

If you weigh less than this, you either have a fast metabolism or are about to gain weight.If you weigh more than this, you may be losing a few pounds soon!

Let's just say - I have lost some... =)

He's a cutie -

...why I don't have the right to be pissed when you ignore my birthday. Tell me why I don't have the right to be upset because you get me jack-shit and then say, "I was gonna.... but..."

Maybe I am selfish, but it is my friggin' birthday and one of the few days of the year when it's ALL ABOUT ME!!! and I get nada!


I spend the majority of the day alone because you and your undying loyalty to everyone but me, has volunteered for something for a couple of hours yet stay three times as long because they didn't get enough people to show - so who suffers? not them... nope that would be me, home all alone. Then you stop on the way home at the drug store to get a card since you didn't take the time to do it any other time prior to 5 pm on the friggin day of. (But again - I am being selfish!)

Then at 5:30, when there is one kid sleeping on me after I spent the last half hour in tears in my room, you say, Can I take you to dinner.

Sure, let me wake up the child who spent the last six hours in the sun, who is now beat and exhausted so we can sit in a restaurant with four smelly cranky kids - woohoo - that'll be fuu-uun!

And then, I get up and make dinner for everyone else (which I refuse to eat - because lest we forget - I am selfish) before I go back to my room for the rest of the night. Then I am accused of being unreasonable - whatever - kiss my ass! (not that he would ever freaking read my blog - that would too take a friggin effort!)

okay - I fell moderately better now that I unloaded - but still....

Jokes from my Jersey Aunt (NOT my kids~)

NUDITY

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a Woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was starknaked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout fromthe back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!

HONESTY

My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'ddropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it inthe garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment then ran to mybathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with acharming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago.

ELDERLY

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderlyshut-ins, I used to take my 4- year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds.The various appliances of old age, particularly the canes , walkers andwheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found her staring at apair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for theinevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "Thetooth fairy will never believe this!"

DRESS-UP

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she sawher dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear thatsuit."

"And why not, darling?"

"You know that it always gives you aheadache the next morning.."

SCHOOL

A little girl had just finished herfirst week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to hermother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

BIBLE

A little boy opened the big familybible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly,something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked atit. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between thepages. "Mama, look what I found", the boy called out.

"What have you got there, dear?"

With astonishment in the young boy'svoice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"