Every now and again, I think we have to step back and say, "no thanks". To any or everything. This is a lesson I took *years* to learn how to do—just ask my chapter-mates and all the various committees and boards I have been on since joining nearly ten years ago. You need me to do that, no prob, I'm our gal. You need that chair occupied, my arse fits just fine, thankyouverymuch. After a while, you've yessed yourself into mental and physical exhaustion. (Let me tell you, it ain't a pretty sight).

It took me a few years before I realized it was okay, and perfectly acceptable to say *no*. Crazy concept for some I'm sure. Don't get me wrong, I am good at the word *no* just ask my kids—they might profess I say it too much (but really I don't, I swear!). What's more than learning the word was learning that I was okay with myself for saying it. It's not letting someone down because you said no. You (and I had to learn at the time this meant me) are not responsible for every little thing. You can't be and keep your sanity.

There are times when I get back to saying yes. If I have the time or it's something I want to make time for. And (this was another lesson I had to learn) if I don't have the time or inclination doesn't mean I don't believe in whatever's asked from me, it just means I don't have the time or inclination. Am I blowing your mind right now... Let me repeat that: just because you say no, doesn't mean you think the question/responsibility asked isn't worthy, it means you just can't do it at that particular time. Take a moment to let that sink in if you will...

While it might sound like I have the hang of it, I still have those weak moments when I shouldn't but pop my hand up and nod a quick, oh crap what did I do nod. But now that I am not inundated with yesses, the one or two that trickle through are manageable and end up being rather enjoyable, because I am not overloaded and pulling hair out at the lack of time and/or energy.

So take my advice and say no every once in a while... it's okay really.